Program Note

This piece is a meditation on two ideas: the slow degradation of memory, and the inevitability of a final breath.

Structurally, the piece is built on the constant push and pull between sudden bursts of clarity and nostalgic fragments, contrasted against static noise and air-breath sounds. A “naïve” and simple chord progression forms the basis of material for this piece, hidden under moments of lucidity.

I wrote this piece while reflecting on my grandmother’s recent passing, having been impacted by the first time in seeing someone’s condition deteriorate up close through dementia. As our family gathered in her room during the final days, we looked at photos and memories while keeping her company. This combination of looking through fleeting memories while being haunted by the sound of labored breathing stuck with me. Hence, the title “Memory of a Breath” refers not only to the two ideas of a fading memory and associations with breathing, but also more personally, my memory of hearing a dying person’s breath - something that I will never forget.

Narrative-wise, this piece is a reflection on this. The electronics gradually degrade from bursts of recollection to static sounds, as the orchestra gets corrupted by inharmonicity towards the middle of the piece. In this grainy haze, a moment of terminal lucidity arises with a buildup into a resplendent climax. All the themes and motives coalesce in fleeting clarity before it then fades into a drawn-out breath, surrounded by serenely calming noise.